Thursday, March 19, 2009

Homeschool Socializatin Program

DISCLAIMER: Please if you attend a public school or your children do, don't think I am trying to bash you or your choices. I found this little article to be hilarious and unfortunately familiar to my own public school experience. I understand that all schools and all children are different.

Australian homeschooling journal, --"In the Kolbe Little Home Journal (Fall 2005), "Homeschooling Family Finds Ways to Adapt to a Public School 'Socialization' Program",

"When my wife and I mention we are strongly considering home schooling our children, we are without fail asked, 'But what about socialization?--' Fortunately, we found a way our kids can receive the same socialization that government schools provide.

On Mondays and Wednesdays, I will personally corner my son in the bathroom, give him a wedgie and take his lunch money.

On Tuesdays and Thursdays, my wife will make sure to tease our children for not being in the 'in' crowd, taking special care to poke fun at any physical abnormalities.

Fridays will be 'Fad and Peer Pressure Day.' We will all compete to see who has the coolest phone, the most expensive clothes, and the loudest, fastest, and most dangerous car.

Every day, my wife and I will adhere to a routine of cursing and swearing in the hall and mentioning our weekend exploits with alcohol and immorality.And we have asked them to report us to the authorities in the event we mention faith, religion, or try to bring up morals and values."


  1. Lol. I was homeschooled until I reached grade 9, then I attended a public high school for the rest of the time. I am thankful my parents raised me this way, because it instilled in me enough values to be strong once I hit the real world. But I also began to hit the real world while under their guidance and roof. I think resistance makes you strong, but you also need that basis at home before you can go any further outside.